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A Week Of Thanksgiving: The Top People on My List

By Children, Family, God, Marriage, Parenting

I’ve been writing about people I’m thankful for this week, encouraging you to do the same. Obviously our greatest thanksgiving should be for our personal relationship with the Living God, but I’m thankful He allows us to have people in our life to love and help shape us. We’ve shared about people who have helped us professionally, been consistent friends, and helped us grow spiritually. You can still do that in the previous posts HERE, HERE AND HERE.

Today, I want to share the group most of us would put at the top of our thankful list….our immediate families. The people in my life I’m most thankful for are my wife and two boys. I’ve previously shared most of these points about them, but they are still true today.

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November 25, 2010
Love0

Friday Discussion: Do Opposites Attract?

By Culture, Funny, Marriage

This Friday discussion originates from a discussion we had in my community group meeting this week. Our topic was marriage and in almost every couple, the husband and wife were extremely different in how they approach situations. It wasn’t a strictly male/female discussion. The males and females were split on some of these issues. It was just that two people wired completely different had married one another. I do know from a counseling standpoint that these difference also cause conflict, but is it who we are attracted to…those that will naturally conflict with our personalities?

So today, share your opinion: Do opposites attract?

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November 5, 2010
Love0

Friday Discussion: Internet Matchmaking

By Culture, Marriage

Today I want to address the issue of online matchmaking.

In the last few years, a large number of the weddings I have performed have been in relationships that started online. Whether through a paid service such as EHarmony or just through random or blind dates connected through Facebook, the numbers of people meeting for the first time via the Internet increases annually. I have never had a problem with this, but apparently some do from responses and reactions I have seen.

Even though the popularity of these is growing, these types of marriages are still not extremely considered “popular”. When I meet a couple that met online, for example, they appear more hesitant to tell me how they met as a couple.

I’m curious of your opinion.

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September 10, 2010
Love0

7 Qualities to Look for in a Pastor’s Wife

By Christians, Church, Encouragement, Family, Marriage

I receive dozens of emails from pastors each week. This one caught my attention and I asked permission to use it here. Hopefully others will benefit from my response and weigh in with their own thoughts. I have changed his name.

Ron,

I hope all is well with you. I frequent your blogs ever so often via twitter, which I do enjoy. the reason for this email is for some direction. It is my belief that the Lord has called me to be a pastor, however I am presently single. I wanted to find out what are some of the qualities one should look for and how should I go about finding a wife as a future pastor. I have been keeping the issue in prayer.

I would love to hear your thoughts.

Sincerely,

Mike

Dear Mike,

Most likely you will not be able to pick every expectation or qualification you have for a spouse. I think is is wise, however, to have a goal. You are more likely to reach a target for which you aim. With that in mind, here are 7 qualities I believe make up the ideal pastor’s wife:

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September 2, 2010
Love13

Advice for Men after the Wife Says the Marriage is Over

By Christians, Encouragement, Fear, Marriage, Prayer

After I have answered a question too many times to count, I figure more people have the same question. One of the issues I see frequently is what happens to men when their marriage caves in around them and their wife no longer wants the marriage to work. This could be because of simple neglect over the years or an affair, but she wants out and he wants her to stay. When this happens, a man often becomes a vulnerable puppy of a man and literally doesn’t’ know what to do next. I’ve sadly seen it so many times. It could be his fault or her fault, but at this point, the man just wants to save his marriage.

Here are a few suggestions I gave even recently to a man in this situation. Although this is a personal reply to one man, I believe it may have application for many men in this situation. One thing needs to be clear, however; you must own your decision. You know your situation far better than anyone else. These suggestions are based on experience with dozens of marriage situations:

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July 8, 2010
Love1

One of the Biggest Mistakes I See in Marriage

By Encouragement, Family, Marriage

Therein lies what I believe to be one of the largest mistake men and women make in a marriage. Whenever I believe Cheryl completely identifies with me or I completely identify with her, we are bound to run into some conflict. I will never understand the depth of emotions Cheryl is capable of producing and she will never understand the shallowness of emotions I am capable of maintaining. Neither of us is right or wrong, we are just different, and as I look at the situations we have handled together in life, I see why God allowed the uniqueness in each of us. I must be careful never to place expectations on Cheryl for her to be like me and she must do the same with me.

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May 27, 2010
Love0

Emotionally Healthy People in a Marriage

By Encouragement, Marriage

Here’s the point: All marriages have trouble at times, but building a healthy marriage ultimately takes two healthy people. If your marriage is in trouble, consider the emotional health of each spouse. People who are individually dealing with issues such as past hurts, broken relationships, damaged emotions, abuse, or personal loss, will have a harder time building a strong relationship until their own emotions heal.

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May 10, 2010
Love0

Men and Women Need Accountability in Marriage

By Christians, Culture, Encouragement, Family, Marriage

I am tired of watching marriages fall apart. What breaks my heart most is when two wonderful people allow temptation to overtake them and fall into the sins such as adultery or pornography. I wish I could say it was rare, but it happens every day. I have seen and believe that marriages can be fully restored from these times and even made model marriages after them, but the goal should be to keep either spouse from reaching this point.

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May 3, 2010
Love0
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