Sometimes life throws curves at us that take the wind from our sail. If we aren’t careful we can allow the injury to haunt us for life; never regaining what we have lost. Have you lost a job recently? Have you had a business failure? Did you suffer from divorce? Has the person you trusted the most hurt you the deepest?
What steps should you take to get back on track and succeed again? Here are a few suggestions to consider during the recovery process:
1. Reconnect with God. This is always a wise idea, but it becomes necessity at times like this.
2. Evaluate your life. Use this time to reevaluate the decisions you have made in life and what got you in the situation you are in today. Are there changes that you made? If so, be willing to change. If you did nothing wrong in this case, release yourself from responsibility.
3. Create some new dreams. Don’t allow past mistakes to keep you from discovering your passions in life. Keep those creative forces going in your mind so you’ll be ready when the next big opportunity comes along.
4. Call in the advisors. Others can usually see things we cannot see. They approach our life from a different perspective. Give someone you trust, who has your best interest at heart, access to the painful part of your life.
5. Don’t take your pain and anger out on others. It doesn’t make things better (usually worse) and it hurts people who did nothing to deserve it.
6. Take a break. Don’t expect to recover immediately. Your struggles probably didn’t start overnight and they will not end overnight. Give yourself time to heal.
7. When it’s time, be willing to risk again. Yes, you may get hurt again, but just as life is full of disappointments, it’s also full of joy and discovery. Remember that everyone is not the same and every situation is different. Don’t hold your past experiences against others who weren’t even there.
8. Don’t let failure or disappointment in life define you. Be defined by God’s love for you and His plan for your life.
9. Do something. Rest yes, but at some point, just do something to stay busy and occupy your mind. It’s true that the “idle mind is the devil’s workshop”. If you lost your job, find somewhere to volunteer until you find another job. If you lost a relationship, find non-sexual relationships through church or civic activities to keep from being alone.
10. Get back in the game. Choose your next steps carefully and don’t keep repeating the same mistakes, but at some point it will be time to enjoy life again. Life was not meant to be lived on the sidelines.
I can say from personal experience that there's alot of wisdom in your advice here. I can relate to most of what you list in the ten items. God is gracious and good. He will bring us through experiences in His time and His way, for His glory!
Thanks Forrest!
Some great tips there. When going through a divorce another good tip is that you have to let go of the negative emotions such as anger, guilt, bitterness because they stop you from moving on.
Following divorce you need to do some personal development work and learn to love yourself and create a life you enjoy before starting to date again.
Working with a Divorce Coach can help you to get there a little faster.
I feel this was a good topic for me righ tnow…Trusting and pain is something very difficult to get over….Thanks for the steps and each day is a stepping stone for me.