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Does Your Church Value Your Family?

By October 13, 2011Church, Family, Leadership

Ben Reed is community groups pastor at Grace Community Church where I serve. Ben is an excellent leader; truly becoming one of the sharpest minds on small groups in the country. If he’s not on your radar he should be. You can learn from him and he loves helping other churches. Recently Ben had a family situation that took him out of the office. Our email and text exchanges through that time prompted this guest post.

Here is a guest post from Ben Reed:

As a church, we say that we value the family. Now I can personally vouch that we do.

I know that older generations accuse my generation of not working hard. But if you spend much time around me, you’ll realize that I don’t fit that mold. (and, in fact, I’d submit that my generation isn’t lazy…we just work differently)

I really enjoy hard work. And when I have to be out of the office for an extended amount of time, it drives me nuts. Not because I’m being pressured  from other team members or not living up to perceived expectations. It’s simply because I love what I do, and I love working hard at it.

When Family Calls

So when I had to be out of the office for 10 days, it was tough. I felt torn: I wanted to be at the office, but I desperately didn’t. See, my wife’s grandfather was rushed to ICU, then transported to hospice care, and I was at his side with my wife’s family for the better part of 10 days. And I wanted to be there, at his side, the entire 10 days.

But I texted Ron, saying this:
I hate being out of the office so long. It is not my style. Sorry I’ve been so absent the last week and a half. I know it’s ‘excusable’ but I also know me being out isn’t ideal.

His response:
It’s ok Ben. It’s one of our values as a church. Family first.

I tell people all of the time that we are a church that truly values family. By the way we’re structured (very simply), we get the chance to tell people, “Gather with us on Sunday, join a small group, and the rest of the week invest in your family!”

But this time, I got to experience this. I was given the freedom to be present with my family when I needed to be present with my family. And I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that my church staff supported me being absent.

We put our money where our mouth is.

When push comes to shove, we value family. Even if that means that things have to slow down. Even if that means that a team member is absent. Even if that means a team member’s voice isn’t present at the table.

We know that if our team members don’t do a good job at home, they can’t do a good job leading their ministries (1 Timothy 3:4). And intellectually, I get that. I’ve even said that to people.

But it was an entirely different matter when I needed to apply that to myself.

My church values my family. Which makes me even more proud to serve her.

Does your church value your family?

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Ron Edmondson

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