One secret to effective speaking is to learn what not to say…
Don’t give everything you’ve got in a message.
A standard joke is about the young preacher giving his first message. After he has studied hard and has lots of information, he can’t help but share everything he’s got. One key, however, to an effective message is when the speaker learns what to say and what not to say. The “what not to say” is perhaps the more important part. I’m not an expert speaker, but for me, the best part of my sermon message preparation is after it’s written, going back and cutting parts of it to tighten up the talk.
Here are 3 suggestions to make a good talk great.
Be intentional to say the right things – It’s easier just to throw everything in the talk. Deciding the right thing to say takes more effort, but makes the talk better.
Honor people’s time – Let’s face it. People are busy. They get bored easily. They check out before you make your final points. Understand this and you’ll keep their attention long enough to say what you need to say.
Leave them wanting more – It’s always good to leave your audience with an anticipation, rather than looking at their watch.
Unless you and I are exceptional communicators (the kind of communicator who is better than they even think they are), then we need to learn how to trim our messages, leaving the best parts and cutting the fluff. We will be more pleased with your results.
Have you sit through a speech or message that went too long?
BTW, what do you do when you get bored listening? Do you sleep…check your phone…doodle? Seriously…I’m curious… (Grace Community Church peeps need not reply…Ha!)
(Pastors, there’s still time for this Sunday!)
I love bringing my Bible and encourage others to bring theirs when they listen to me. Often the rabbit trails people go on are more powerful than the message.
I always laugh when someone comes and shares how a message touches them and why and I know it wasn't what I said, but what the Spirit said to them while they were on their own personal rabbit trail.
Thanks Rev!
Twitter: tijuanabecky
says:
I get bored easily during some messages, depends on the speaker/pastor/preacher and the topic. If it doesn't relate to me I'm probably pretending to pay attention but really thinking and making notes about a blogpost, some other idea I have, or totally daydreaming. If I'm running the media, which means I have to pay attention so I get your points on the screen when you say them, I'm typically daydreaming probably. However either way I'm listening and paying attention you just don't have my full attention if it doesn't apply or your talking about something that from what I can tell doesn't really have meaning anyway. I've never heard you preach Ron so can't say what I'd be doing or thinking if at the church you pastor and whether I'd be fully engaged and taking notes on your message or if I'd be rather checked out but that is what happens when I'm at other physical churches.
Thanks for your honesty!
Ron- absolutely love your blog and tweets. Learning so much! How long do you typically speak? And do you ever break your message up into parts during the same service?
Typically 30 minutes. You can view all my messages at Grace online…that's scary! Yes, we have broken up the message before into different parts in the same service, but not very often. Probably should do that more. Thank you!
I was sitting in chapel once during college where the speaker was boring…I remembered the topic of the sermonette that day only because I had to remind myself what the speaking was supposedly talking about. (And no I don't remember what the topic was any longer, 12 years can do things to the memory)
When I'm at church, sometimes I read the passage of scripture along w/ the pastor; then I find it interesting and read more of it thus missing some of the sermon.
I like to take notes during sermons/messages and by looking at my notes it's easy to see what messages are stronger than others… some days it'll be 2-3 pages of notes… other days it'll be the topic header and lots of doodle.
Another tip… watch how many/how long the personal anecdotes are… I'm all for relative illustrations and building a report with the audience, but I've left church more than once feeling like I just had story time with Pastor, rather than a learning experience.
Winston Churchill said, "Say what you have to say and the first time you come to a sentence with a grammatical ending–sit down."
I don't think you're advocating for anything that tight in terms of length, but he impressed me as someone who thought and prepared carefully for his speeches. He also said something about the most important message use the fewest words.
Thanks for this reminder. I have a message I'm giving this weekend.
Yea, not that short…I have more I want to say 🙂 But, great word from a great communicator!
Ron,
Great post (again). I grew up in a church where the pastor went for about a hour and a half. It was LONG. I try to speak for about 35, 45 minutes if I'm going long.
When someone is going long, let's just say the I-phone has some great games on it. However, sitting next to my wife she gives that rolled eye look. I smile, and endure the rest of the message, but now only looking at the guy but thinking of other things.
Ha! Those iPhone games…that's what I thought.