I don’t usually read forwarded emails (Please pay attention to that comment), but I received this about four times in one day and one was from my wife, so, sensing she may ask me about it later, I read it. Glad I did. Here are some things most men want you to know ladies, but for whatever reason they were afraid to say them. I’m not! Some things need to be said.
The Man Rules
Finally , the guys’ side of the story. We always hear ” the rules” from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side.
Please note.. these are all numbered “1 ” ON PURPOSE!
1. Men are NOT mind readers.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You’re a big girl. If it’s up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don’t hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
1. Sunday sports It’s like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.
1.. Crying is blackmail.
1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That’s what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days..
1. If you think you’re fat, you probably are.
Don’t ask us.
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself..
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..
1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say “nothing,” We will act like nothing’s wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
1. If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to, Expect an answer you don’t want to hear.
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine… ! ! Really .
1. Don’t ask us what we’re thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball
or golf.
1. You have enough clothes..
1. You have too many shoes.
1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
But did you know men really don’t mind that? It’s like camping.
I don’t know where this originated, but it’s good.
What would you add to the list?
(PS. Sweetheart, these are really for every other man. I’m good.)
Funny, true and so importend in times like these. Thanks for posting.
Thank you Andrew.
I am laughing my heart out! this is really funny! Thanks!
Ha! Thanks!
Wow… this is really sexist. What a bunch of unfair stereotypes.
Duke – neither does Ron. That was one of our “rules” when we got married. We make it a point never to go to bed upset with each other so one of us sleeping on the couch is not an option (unless we are sick and not wanting to “share” what we have). But on ther other hand – some of the others are very applicable…..
Having lived almost forty-four years as a married woman, I agree with many of these observations. Wives demonstrate their love for their husbands by accepting differences with patience and humor.
I don’t sleep on the couch. Ever.
Ok I agreed with most of these but I am actually surprised at how many (at least 3) I don’t actually think… I hassle too many of my friends if they say fine or nothing as answers to how are you? or what’s wrong?
Nathan Edwards’s last blog post..Leadership Hero’s #1