Whenever I post about my introversion, the introverts come out from behind their computer 🙂
I re-posted 7 Pitfalls of Being an Introverted Pastor and received numerous Twitter messages from like-wired pastors.
I also received the following email:
Ron I read you article about the pitfalls of Being an Introverted Pastor. I can so see every point in myself and it is compounded by being the pastor of a small country church who thrives on personal relationships. The aloof title has been attributed to me more than once since coming here. it is so bad I am questioning my calling as a senior pastor and wondering if I would not be better working as an associate behind the scenes. Do you have any advice for a struggling fellow introvert?
Pastor ________
(I asked permission to share the email, but obviously withheld the name.)
Here is my reply:
You might read this post: 7 Ways I Work with Introversion to Protect My Ministry. Basically, I think you have to pray, suck it up, and put your extrovert on each Sunday. I know that’s hard advice, but it was given to me by a dear, wise deacon early in my ministry and I’ve been using it ever since.
I wouldn’t negate your calling because of your wiring. God didn’t let Gideon or Moses have that excuse. That one would be too easy! 🙂
By the way, I may use your email (without your name) as another blog post on this topic, since it’s such a popular theme. We don’t struggle alone.
Ron
Dear Introverted pastor! (Or dear whatever your personal struggle that keeps you from feeling completely qualified to be a pastor pastor),
Don’t allow your personality or any other weakness to keep you from doing what God has called you to do. Where you are weakest, God’s glory can shine brightest in your life.
Be honest. What’s one weakness that keeps you knowing you need God’s strength to overcome?
Choosing to be an extrovert on Sunday mornings resonates as being a strategy to persue. I think that also holds up in the cell group situation. I chat and share easily with 2 or 3 others – more people than this I just tend to listen and reflect. I learn quite a bit that way, but perhaps I have something to share that should be 'out there' in the group situations. Thanks for the post 🙂
Thank you! I suspect you have lots to share.
Your article on introversion resonated with me. Nobody believes that I am shy because I am constantly speaking in public and I am very confident. My tendency is to be a lone wolf. Networking and relationship building is a huge challenge for me as a pastor. Thank you for writing.
Thank you. Yea, our public perception confuses people of our true personality.
I can understand the struggles of an introverted pastor (since I am in the same boat with them as an introvert). I can sense their internal mind war.
Thanks Uma
Beyond the introverted personality, the weakness that is a "thorn in the flesh" has to be self-doubt. I have to keep remembering that He made me, equipped me, and called me to do what I do.
You know, I think more men deal with this than we would imagine.
Shy, introvert, quiet at gatherings, social events, etc. ( immediate family would beg to differ)….these all describe me as well. Yes, it can be a weakness…but I feel God helps me to be a better listener….great trade off I think, and He knows best.
I agree with Bryan K.'s comment…"I can't do small talk". It's not that I'm not interested, it's just I would rather sit back and take it all in, most of the times, great learning experiences.
Another making me think post, thank you.
Yea, small talk is harder for me too. I'm much more purposeful.
My weakness can be "spread too thin" , then I feel inadequate.
yes, I've been there many times.
Twitter: KariScare
says:
My biggest weakness is being shy. This keeps me from connecting with new people at church and even from approaching people I already know. This keeps me from giving my opinion, and it makes me unapproachable. Help me Jesus!
I understand. Push through it as you can and you'll see God rewarding you!
Twitter: bryankr
says:
The hardest part I have to deal with as an introvert, although I am not a Pastor, is when it comes to public gatherings: I.e. Christmas parties, potlucks. Like that. I usually wind up sitting there with nothing to say; I simply can’t do small talk! If there is something for me to talk about, I can talk the wallpaper off a wall! If I don’t….I’m stuck!
Yes, I'm with you!
You are wired the way God intended. Go the way He has called you to go. He has not made an error. The error would be to deny you calling. I've been there and made that error. Am in recovery from it and believe the Lord has now giving me a fresh chance. God works wonders through us when we feel most vulnerable. He does not waste any experience. Be blessed.
Amen! Thank you