10 Ways My Life Would Change if Spam Were True

I usually clean out my spam folder in my email account several times a day.  I don’t like seeing that number beside the word “Spam”.  This morning as I was doing a mass delete a thought occurred to me.  What if all of these emails were not really spam?  How different could my life be if all my spam emails were true? 

Here are 10 ways my life would change if spam email were “true” based on today’s spam:

1.       I would receive some secret money from a wealthy deceased guy from Egypt. (And Nigeria, Iraq, Ghana, and Uganda.)

2.       I’d meet the “real” love of my life.  (Honey, don’t worry, I ain’t looking.)

3.       I would have more “energy” than I ever imagined.

4.       I could save on printer cartridges.

5.       I wouldn’t smoke anymore.  (If indeed I did smoke.)

6.       I would get some great deals on watches.

7.       I’d be invited to an online casino party. 

8.       Of course, I’d be more of a man.  (much, much more.)

9.       I would have won the European lottery.  (That I’ve never even played.)

10.   I could find out some cool stuff about Paris Hilton.

(Well, I guess that one might be true.)